I’m off first thing in the morning to get a zipper put in my leg — a nice metal plate and a couple of screws, a few more weeks with my leg stuck in the air, three to four months in a cast, several weeks of physical therapy and oh, maybe a box or three of wine to seal the deal.
Once I can manage to hold this trusty old laptop without screaming, MEDIC, MEDIC, we’ll all sit down and have a nice chat about how to not break your leg by tripping over cracks in the sidewalk. We can share scars and swap medical horror stories. We can be Brothers and Sisters of The Leg. We can tremble together as we dim the lamps and tell stories around a crackling campfire about the headless ghost in the mall who captures unsuspecting women and snaps their legs like little dry twigs.
I’ll see you soon.
In the meantime, stay safe. Be well. Keep the oily side down and write, write, write.
I’m not a doctor, nor did I stay at Holiday Inn Express last night, but I think a little JB WELD and some duct tape would work just fine! But then again, I’m not a doctor…
Which reminds me, did you happen to see the comic in the paper (today, I think) where the doctor is telling the patient that it will be extra difficult to cure his case of tapeworm…because it’s a duct tape worm!
Yeah, kinda sick, I know, but I hope you (and other readers) got a laugh.
If you have any more “pirate trouble,” let me know and I’ll send Edward Pierce and his crew to deal with them. (He’s the protagonist in my Stone Island Sea Stories books.)
Dave
Oh Auburn,
I am so sorry to hear about your break.
I send you well wishes, and the hope of good strong drugs.
And, of course and always, writing inspiration.
all the best,
drew
Thank you my good friends. Dave, you most certainly MUST send your Edward Pierce to vanquish those dastardly pirates. They now have me with my toes clutching the end of the plank and they’re poking at me with sharp sticks. Ow. OW!!
Drew, thank you for the lovely comment. Yes, they’ve provided me with some nice strong medicine. I wouldn’t quite call it the Hair of the Dog, but it’s good enough for the likes of me.
It’s good to be home after 2 days in the hospital, albeit needing to keep my leg in the air for the next two weeks. They put a pink cast with sparkles no less on my poor leg. It helps to know that I have lovely friends and well-wishers.
Thank you all. By the way, those who were to receive DancingBirds.com hats will need to wait a while. I’m homebound for the next four months. I’m so sorry but I won’t forget about it.